“Theoretically, I can imagine that someday we will regard our children not as creatures to manipulate or to change, but rather as messengers from a world we once deeply knew, but which we have long since forgotten, who can reveal to us more about the true secrets of life, and also our own lives, than our parents were ever able to.”

― Alice Miller

Understanding your child

One of Maria Montessori’s famous quotes was that if the child can not learn the way we teach him/her, then we should teach him/her with the way that he can learn. Sounds confusing, but here is where Astrology comes in aid.

The world is changing rapidly, especially these last years. Our children are learning to function in a world that pretty soon will be technologically dominated. How many of us are fully prepared to support and guide our kids through a world that is constantly evolving?

Do we ever wonder if we are fully aware of our children’s needs, gifts, or challenges they might be facing? Do we really understand our kids, is the question here. How many parents are even aware of the similarities and differences between themselves and their child (or children)?

Knowing your child in a deepest level helps in a better communication and to overcome obstacles that may appear on the way. Parenting is a hard job that doesn’t come with a manual. We can all do our best and hope for a smooth result in this journey, but it never hurts to ask for help.

children's services 2
children's services 1


The technique I use for reading children’s charts, is how I learned it from my teacher Cornelia Hansen, who takes temperament and development into consideration and the work of Bruce Scofeld of connecting astrology to the developmental model. As Cornelia Hansen states in her book Kidwheels: “When parents are informed and capable of changing their parenting strategies, change in the behavior of the child can occur. With emotional support and encouragement, inhibited children can learn to adapt more rapidly and successfully. When uncontrolled children are given consistent, firm boundaries along with warm, loving care, they can gradually master self-control.”

For this consultation, there will be an hour and a half recorded Zoom meeting, along with at least an 8 page report. You can find a sample of a report here.

Sample Report



NAME: Athena, born January 2014



                                                       OTHER COMBINATIONS  

Lack of:____Earth__                                                  Overemphasis on: __Air______________


Water/Earth: ____24________                           Air/Water: ___73__Water/Fire: ___39___

Air/Fire: ________76_______                              Air/Earth: ___61___ Earth/Fire: ___27____



Positive__x____                           Balanced______                       Negative______

Notes:  Athena’s quality of mood is positive, which means she is a happy, outgoing and friendly child. She has an emphasis in Air/Fire, which gives her an optimistic approach to life, with an excessive amount of energy. This restless drive that she has, can giver inspiration and creativity, but at the same time can drain her, so that she gets bored and tired quickly.

She doesn’t have much earth and this may show a disinterest in food in general, leading the parents to struggle to persuade her to eat in normal intervals. Also, she is not very grounded, at points she seems lost and sometimes she may face difficulties in expressing herself. Probably she will feel tired at times, but she will not admit it, because she thinks that rest, like eating, is a waste of time. But she’s having a strong imagination that she can use to express her creativity.

Her incompatible Air/Water combination makes her a sensitive child, emphasizing more her strong imagination and her creativity. But, she will be able to shift around a problem and regroup from a different angle, especially in school life. At times, she will be Hurricane Athena, but as soon as she can balance her emotional with her intellectual world, she will be able to achieve a lot. And the Air/Earth comes to balance somehow things, by giving her a maturity very much advanced for her age. (Although her Saturn in the 5th House, plays a role in this, too). Here, parents should engage with the child in fun activities and encourage spontaneity.



APPROACH: Balanced



Notes: Athena has a balanced to high level of approach to things and situations, but it may take her a little bit longer to adapt in it. She is a fixed air type, so if we see her Uranus in Mars decan, which is also in Mars, and the dwad, which is in Cancer, ruled by Moon, we could say that she needs a few minutes to adjust; but when she feels secure in the new situation/environment, it’s easy for her to be sociable, to explore around and be quite comfortable in the surroundings. Parents should be aware about this small amount of time that she needs to adjust and be with her until she feels secure. Then, she becomes quite independent with a need to explore with confidence.



Notes: The energy level that Athena reacts to things is pretty much balanced. But she has a T-Square Jupiter/Asc-Pluto/Venus opposition with Uranus in Aries as the apex planet, so when she feels that something is unfair, she may react very intensely to situations.



Determining the child’s type from speed of Moon and whether Mercury precedes or trails the Sun. 

Type 1 Fast Moon -Mercury trails Sun      Alert/Certain                    __x____

Notes: As far as her perception and response is concerned, she is more certain and less prone to make mistakes. She likes to think before she speaks or acts, and she is cautious in general. Also, it is easy for her to adjust to the rules and she needs rules in a way, in order to be able to function. Probably she will not face any particular problems at school, and she will be among the kids that the teachers like. She has also Saturn in the 5th House, which makes her mature, responsible and focused on goals.




Notes:  Athena has a balanced distractibility level and a high level of persistence.  That means she is highly focused; she completes tasks, and she follows through. Most probably she will do good at school, because she has a trine between Mercury and Mars and a square between Mercury and Saturn too, which adds mental organization skills and sticks to routine. She has a positive mood, which also emphasizes her persistence and makes her independent and bright. But also, she is stubborn, and she likes having her own way of things. Her Mars semisextile Saturn also shows a combination of activity and organizational skills.




Notes: Athena, as far activity levels are concerned, she is balanced. She can move easily between very intense activities and noticeably quiet ones, and back again, without a problem. Her Mars is also in detriment in Libra, which doesn’t make her extremely active, rather balanced. But Pluto is in opposition to the Ascendant which can give her stamina to continue activities.



  • Activity Level: This is the child’s “idle speed or how active the child is generally. Does the infant always wiggle, more squirm? Is the infant difficult to diaper because of this? Is the infant content to sit and quietly watch? Does the child have difficulty sitting still? Is the child always on the go? Or, does the child prefer sedentary quiet activities? Highly active children may channel such extra energy into success in sports; may perform well in high-energy careers and may be able to keep up with many different responsibilities.
  • Distractibility: The degree of concentration and paying attention displayed when a child is not particularly interested in an activity. This trait refers to the ease with which external stimuli interfere with ongoing behavior. Is the infant easily distracted by sounds or sights while drinking a bottle? Is the infant easily soothed when upset by being offered alternate activity? Does the child become sidetracked easily when attempting to follow routine or working on some activity? High distractibility is seen as positive when it is easy to divert a child from an undesirable behavior but seen as negative when it prevents the child from finishing schoolwork.
  • Intensity: The energy level of a response whether positive or negative. Does the infant react strongly and loudly to everything, even relatively minor events? Does the child show pleasure or upset strongly and dramatically? Or does the child just get quiet when upset? Intense children are more likely to have their needs met and may have depth and delight of emotion rarely experienced by others. These children may be gifted in dramatic arts. Intense children tend to be exhausting to live with.
  • Regularity: The trait refers to the predictability of biological functions like appetite and sleep. Does the child get hungry or tired at predictable times? Or, is the child unpredictable in terms of hunger and tiredness? As grown-ups irregular individuals may do better than others with traveling as well as be likely to adapt to careers with unusual working hours.
  • Sensory Threshold: Related to how sensitive this child is to physical stimuli. It is the amount of stimulation (sounds, tastes, touch, temperature changes) needed to produce a response in the child. Does the child react positively or negatively to particular sounds? Does the child startle easily to sounds? Is the child a picky eater or will he eat almost anything? Does the child respond positively or negatively to the feel of clothing? Overly sensitive individuals are more likely to be artistic and creative.
  • Approach/Withdrawal: Refers to the child’s characteristic response to a new situation or strangers. Does the child eagerly approach new situations or people? Or does the child seem hesitant and resistant when faced with new situations, people, or things? Slow-to-warm up children tend to think before they act. They are less likely to act impulsively during adolescence.
  • Adaptability: Related to how easily the child adapts to transitions and changes, like switching to a new activity. Does the child have difficulty with changes in routines, or with transitions from one activity to another? Does the child take a long time to become comfortable to new situations? A slow-to-adapt child is less likely to rush into dangerous situations and may be less influenced by peer pressure.
  • Persistence: This is the length of time a child continues in activities in the face of obstacles. Does the child continue to work on a puzzle when he has difficulty with it or does, he just move on to another activity? Is the child able to wait to have his needs met? Does the child react strongly when interrupted in an activity? When a child persists in an activity he is asked to stop, he is labeled as stubborn. When a child stays with a tough puzzle he is seen as being patient. The highly persistent child is more likely to succeed in reaching goals. A child with low persistence may develop strong social skills because he realizes other people can help.
  • Mood: This is the tendency to react to the world primarily in a positive or negative way. Does the child see the glass as half full? Does he focus on the positive aspects of life? Is the child generally in a happy mood? Or, does the child see the gall as half empty and tend to focus on the negative aspects of life? Is the child generally serious? Serious children tend to be analytical and evaluate situations carefully.




Athena has a fixed air astrological type, with a positive mood. She has a high approach with a low, to balanced adaptability, depending the situation. Her intensity of reaction is balanced most of the times, but it is possible to react intense in certain situations that feels not justified. Her threshold of response is alert/certain and this adds to her adaptability. She has a balanced distractibility level, but she has a lot of persistence. Her activity levels are balanced.

From all the above, Athena seems to be a persistent child. This persistence comes with a positive mood, and some degree of adaptability, so it is very possible that she will be doing good in school. She has the ability to pay attention and complete the assigned tasks. She will get engrossed in activities, but she will have a difficulty making transitions. Also she will be stubborn and she can nag until she gets what she wants.



Athena’s parental axis is 4th House Cusp in Virgo (Mutable Earth) and 10th House cusp in Pisces (Mutable Water). She is a Fixed Air type and fits better to the 10th House Cusp. Although the elements are incompatible in the 4th House Cusp, there is not so much conflict, according to Arroyo. And if the parents and the child manage to focus these incompatible energies to a harmonious result everything could work out fine. She has a balanced quality of mood with a balanced to low adaptability, but with a high approach level. So, it wouldn’t much difficult for her to adapt in this home environment.

Starting from the 4th House Cusp, the Ruler is Mercury. Athena has Mercury in Aquarius which is Father’s Ascendant and Mother’s Descendant. Also, both parents have Moon in Gemini, which is Ruled by Mercury. Also, the 4th House Casp Decan is in Mercury.

10th House Cusp traditional Ruler is Jupiter, which is in exaltation in Cancer, conjuct the Ascendant.  Both parents have Sun in Cancer.

Also the rulers of the axis, Jupiter and Mercury, are forming a Sesquiquadrate. There is a conflict, but nothing of a major importance that can’t be handled.

We could say that the home environment is not a perfect fit for Athena, but there is an effort for communication from the parents, they are there for her, supporting her and taking care for her a lot.



Athena’s 4th House is in Libra. It’s a cardinal air sign which would fit with her fixed air astrological type. There is balance and tenderness in the environment. But Venus is in Capricorn, in the 7th House, conjuct to Pluto and in opposition to Jupiter and Ascendant in Cancer, in the 1st House. And the Venus and Pluto Decans are in Venus. This might show that the parents have taken seriously on their task to take care and provide everything to the baby, following a schedule according to the baby’s needs.

She has Mars in the 4th House, in Detriment, in Scorpio and the Decan is in Mercury which indicates that maybe the father was gone a lot in the first years or that the parents used to move a lot before they finally settled down. But also Mars is in a partile semi-sextile with Saturn in Scorpio. This might show a special connection to the father. Perhaps the father was taking care of her the first couple of months, due to mother’s postpartum depression and then when he had to leave for work, the baby felt deep his absence.



Moon is forming an approaching quincunx with Jupiter, an approaching quintile with Saturn, an approaching sextile with Uranus, a separating semi-sextile with Neptune and an approaching semi-sextile with Pluto. Venus is also conjuct to Pluto. Here we see the moon forming many aspects and the mother tries her best to be supportive and nurturing (Jupiter), but she may face difficulties at times. Perhaps she had a light postpartum depression after birth (Neptune). She tries hard to find a balance between a healthy relationship with the child, but at times she is over protective and strict to the rules (Pluto). But she also encourages child’s independence (Uranus)



Athena’s 10th House is in Aries. She is a fixed Air, so there is a compatibility with the environment. Aries Ruler, Mars, is in Detriment in Libra, in the 4th. She has Uranus in the 10th House, in Aries, which is the modern Ruler of Aquarius where her Sun, Moon and Mercury are. There is a lot of communication in the family, but there is a strong urge for independence and achievement that is rewarded. Uranus Decan is in Mars and Dwad in Cancer. And Mars Decan is in Mercury and Dwad in Cancer. This may indicate that there are strict rules, but the parents communicate with the child and these rules are adjusting. Also, there is an appreciation of freedom in the family. The child is free to make her own decisions, under the parent’s supervision. Uranus though emphasizes her persistence and makes her to want everything her way. There are conflicts here that makes the parents to choose their battles.



The family style is between Authoritative and Permissive. Parents are flexible, supportive and they have guidelines and rules that have worked together with the child. But sometimes they fail to enforce the rules and give to the child an extra amount of freedom that the child can not handle yet. Also sometimes are lenient and sometimes they are having discussions of how and why the rules must be followed. This might confuse the child.



Athena’s Sun and Moon are conjuct in Aquarius in the 8th House. Their Ruler, Uranus, is in the 10th House, which shows that the parents are open minded and in the same wave length, as far as structure is concerned in Athena’s life. Also, Sun’s Decan is in Mercury and Moon’s Decan is in Uranus. In the chart, Uranus is in Aries, in the 10th and Mercury in Aquarius in the 8th. They are forming a Novile, which might mean that there is a happy marriage, based in communication and constant development. Moon’s Dwad is in Aries and Sun’s Dwad is in Gemini, which reinforces the connection of the parents, describing the father as more communicative and the mother eager to find ways to advance the relationship, and in extend to make a better family environment.



First of all, parents should reward persistence when it is appropriate. Try to communicate a lot with the child and teach her the art of negotiation and compromise.

Persistent children are having a difficulty in making transitions. So, it would be best to avoid activities before a transition time. And inform her on time about transitions and routines. If the child knows what to expect, it will be unlikely to resist.

A persistent child often has tantrums or is very stubborn. In this case the parent must have lots of patience, be also persistent, and by no means let the child gets away with it, as much as the child nags about it. A good idea would be to develop a code word with the child you can use to remind her it’s time to stop nagging.

If the child has mild or intense reactions, it would be best to give her time and space to calm down. Deep breaths help a lot in this situation. It is always futile to get engaged in power struggles. Just set firm limits, but also be willing to empathize with the child’s feelings when she doesn’t always get what she wants. She’ll learn the resilience to survive disappointment. The parent should always stay calm, discuss with the child and give options. Another important factor is to make sure that she knows the rules. Even better, try to make the rules with her, or explain in a very understandable way why you have these rules.

To summarize, patience and communication are basics in a relationship with a persistent child. Talk with her as much as possible, be patient and have empathy towards the child as much as possible.



Persistence is a trait that if the parent has enough patience to handle, it can be valuable for a future success in life. Persistence is also a trait that teachers love. If a child is persistent, usually has the ability to pay attention and complete the assigned tasks at school.

Athena is a bright child that needs a lot of support and guidance in order to grow into a healthy, mature and sensitive individual. Parents should teach her that along with freedom comes a great responsibility towards herself and the others. Also parents should try hard to put and teach about the usefulness of limitations. Athena needs the right rules in her life, and it is important to learn their significance from a young age.

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